Tuangou

Tuangou (twân-goo): Chinese Internet consumer phenomenon spreading like wildfire

July 16, 1.50pm, Beijing – Shopkeepers smoke pipes in happy contentment. They smile at each other benevolently, and eat tofu and rice. Peace reigns.

2pm, Beijing – Fifty Chinese men and women, who have never seen each other before, suddenly materialize at a local electronics store. They’ve been dying to buy new DVD players and music systems and other such, but have held off until this moment. Now they proceed to rapidly fill their shopping baskets.

2.20pm, Beijing – Fifty Chinese men, women and DVD players descend upon the checkout counter, and the patrons demand a 30% discount as a reward for buying en-masse. The shopkeeper lowers his pipe and cries blue murder. Fifty wallets threaten to leave the store. The shopkeeper relents and caves in. Half a loaf is better than no bread.

2.30pm, Beijing – Exeunt severally.

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Prelude: July 15. In a gleaming glass building with talking elevators and neon lights, Haowen Bu logs on to www.51tuangou.com and adds his name to the DVD-Player list. He is number 39, right below Li Cheng. He does not know Li Cheng, and doesn’t really want to. All he wants is a discount – and he will get it.

This is tuangou.

End of lesson.